learning lessons....

work out your faith, WRESTLE with it...with fear and trembling.

that is what this place here has been for me.

honest reflection, being transparent before so many other hearts...sharing my story of how our daughter's short life changed mine so drastically....how my walk and faith in my Jesus has grown and been refined because of our loss....how all of the despair i have seen and felt has ultimately brought me back to the foot of the Cross over and over....and taught me more about compassion and empathy and how to love others...because all i have to do is look at the Cross and i see it. i can't ignore that there is pain in death and sadness and tragic damage to your soul and heart....but BECAUSE OF CHRIST's sacrifice, there is more to it. there is Hope beyond death. there is new life after the dying. a REDEEMED and RESTORED gift that He gave us in with His life. there is sorrow...but because of the Cross, there is JOY that follows it. and it will last forever. because of His mercy, my sadness pails in comparison to what is to come.....

to share that with others your testimony is to give God a voice, of what He can do, what is Possible through Him...AND SHINE ALL LIGHT ON HIM, not you.

even in the storms, He never abandon's us. He waits for us patiently, as we work through our selfishness and grief...

i have found encouragement here from other moms, other Believers, new friends that were once strangers but God saw fit to thread them into my heart.....

i have had TRUTH and kindness spoken to me through so many of you, even states away and not living in the same town with me, you have encouraged me spiritually in huge ways....i have seen compassion and empathy and Hope born of suffering and being honest about my heart and sharing burdens with others....and met others on their journeys and done the same..

i am very thankful for all of you who have prayed for us, encouraged us, allowed me to wrestle with my fragile faith in the most beautiful way, HONESTLY....

i trust that God is the One who receives the Glory for any fruit that has come of this journey in words here, not me...i trust that His work is not even finished when it comes to walking alongside each other and sharing life and Truth with one another in dark storms or sunny days of life...He has so much Good to do within us if we just simply put our own selves aside and look to Him for guidance and grace...and let Him work through us. and that can happen, when we stop working on our own to find it apart from Him.

thank you for walking alongside of me, in my spiritual fits, in my valleys of darkness and in my moments of pure God given Joy that comes when i CHOOSE Him over all the rest.....thank you for letting the story of our daughter continue to inspire God's mercy and grace and love in your own lives....i like to think of it as a beautiful echo that continues to bounce through time..

when you bump into me, my heart and life spill over....the good and the bad. the weak and the fragile but the oh so tender but beautiful strength that comes from my Savior...found at the foot of the Cross....grace. GRACE.

without Grace, i am nothing.